so today on campus there were these guys handing out NKJV's on campus. normally stuff like this wouldn't really bother me but for some reason i was so irritated by it.
why?
it's not like they are shoving something down my throat or selling ridiculous ideas under the same religion as me. they weren't waving signs that said "homo sex is Sin!" or anything like that. they were just handing out New Testaments.
i think part of it was the fact that i was offered 6 Bibles in 30 minutes. maybe its because i felt like more of a number than like a person. i'm not trying to say that the motive behind their actions wasn't sound. i think college is a ground that is festering with a mess of ideas and I really honestly think that it's a place that, world-view-wise, can change the way you see the world and Live the rest of your life. so obviously i think that it's wise to get the Christian View out there but for some reason this didn't feel right.
i finally decided to talk to the last guy before my destination. I stopped, saying "good morning." without even offering a supporting salutation, he said "do you want One?" and i just said no, with out even thinking if i really did need a 15th copy of the Bible. i was just annoyed at being offered so many already. let me also mention that with the exception of one guy, they were all males, at least 55 and they all looked like they flew in from texas that morning...bola tie and everything. i asked how his day was going... giving him the chance to make a connection.
i was internally hoping and wishing he would seize the opportunity to make a Connection and Abolish my preconceived Notions about him and his organization. he didn't Redeem himself. he started talking about how Campus Crusades for Christ signed them onto campus last year and they gave out almost 5,000 Bibles (another number...yuck) but they wouldn't sign for them this year (i wonder why?). he said the issue they had was that most people were offered too many Bibles. then this was the line that killed me:
"we started to notice that if we asked one or two times they just walk by but some times if they got asked by like 4 or 5 people they finally just Took one to Shut us up."
normally that would be okay but he Laughed like it was a good thing. He really did crack up like it was the funniest Joke he'd ever heard. is that really what Christians have become? are we really to the point where we Bug people 'til they Submit just to get us to leave them off their back? if that's what it's come to then i'm really not Okay with that.
why do we have to push people to meet some imaginary number Quota? who
started this Craziness? who decided that we have to constantly Compare ourselves to worldly standards like Numbers to prove to ourselves or others that we are good enough Christians? it's ridiculous! who cares if the works you do are great if your heart is no where in the right place? don't you think the God who created us in His image, His image of Love, would rather see us do one Little thing in Love than try and Convert a whole campus through force? even if hundreds of people were "saved" today while Thousands were annoyed, or offended or angered, is that really better than one person being nudged in the right direction all in the name of Loving people? i don't know if this is the right way of thinking so don't take what i say as an ultimate Truth.
it just makes me think. recently, while watching politics and listening to every one's Opinions, i've started to Sympathize with everyone who has a deep seeded Hatred of Christians... i really am starting to almost think that way. one person i know does not like Religion of any sort it seems. they say they subscribe to a certain Religion (the variety of which is immaterial at the moment) but they do nothing for it... they don't follow the "Rules" and i have started to notice that around me they point out all sorts of Messed up things that Christians have done. whether it be political or something a friend encountered. i'm almost starting to feel like they are trying to show me that i Contribute to a really Screwed up group in our Society. now usually i would stand my ground and say no, Christians aren't Messed up, we do lots of Good... look at africa or nola... we are Changing to world! But recently i've just sat there and said things like "that's so Messed up." or "that really pisses me off."
i'm not at all denouncing my Faith. my Faith in the one Person who is all about Love, every Minute of every Day to every One in a way that is so much more Perfect than i can even imagine, has Saved my Life in numerous ways and i would Hope that i can watch it Change my heart and how i Live which will ripple out and Touch the Lives of the people i live with and around. me being Christian is one of the few things that makes sense in this Crazy Life that i Live. i'm Not Perfect and i know that and i will never claim to be Better than anyone because i believe something different than them. i am not better...i'm just Different and my Life therefore is Different and the way i Experience life is also Different.
i'm guess i'm just starting to lose Faith in my fellow Christians. i've always seen my Faith as a little different than Mainstream. mostly because this Man named Zack Weingartner showed me a Radical new way to look at Jesus outside of boring churches focused more on their Rituals and social Standing that the stuff they are Preaching. he showed me a whole new way to see Religion which is so much different than this Diluted focus on the family/new life approach to it. i'm not your Typical Christian at all. i am pro-Choice, believe that You should be able to marry who you want, think that God is Amazing enough to have created our universe and us just as described in the big bang theory and evolution. i'm Anything but your conservative, Yuppie holier than thou Christian.
because i recognize these Differences between me and Mainstream stuff like this usually slides off and i just think to myself "they just don't get Iit yet...but they Will." this time, it wasn't like that. the whole Conversation with this gideon's guy actually made me Upset. i couldn't let it Go like i can with the people who Yell through bull horns about Repentance on street corners.
mr. bola tie then told me about how they Expected to hand out at least 5,000 Bibles today and they really wanted to do Better than they did last year. i have no idea if they met their Goal but i know they were Gone 4 hours later when my room mate went to class. i don't know why it made me so Mad but something about it made me really Aggravated.
maybe it's not an Issue but that's my soap box for the day... hope no one was Offended.
Walk in Love!
10.28.2008
Gideon's
Posted by Mack at 10:02 PM
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4 comments:
Wow. That was deep....
What if I just left the comment at that? Couldn't u imagine....
I agree that its way sketch if they're there just to hit a certain quota of bibles handed out. Handing out a bible and just saying have a nice day or whatever I believe isn't what their purpose is. And yes it is saddening and irritating when people do stuff they don't understand the deeper meaning of in the name of jesus.
It doesn't make sense that someone would boast about the fact that people give in just to get them to go away. But again it shows that he does not understand the full meaning of what he's called to do... but if all christians knew the meaning of what they're called to do, we wouldn't have pastors having having sex outside his marriage or worship leaders raping other members of the band. And we wouldn't have missionaries evangelizing by being an accomplice to a drug deal or doing drugs on the mission period.
Its frustrating. Saddening. Irritating. Upsetting. Confusing. But it is what it is. As the youth of this generation its up to us to see these faults and learn from them so when we go out and when we do what were called to do we know why were doing it and what or who were doing it for. It sucks that christians have been stereotyped for "radically" or quite frankly forcefully getting others to believe in what we believe. We know better than that. The gideons should know that. We can't push what we know and believe on others. And we shouldn't. And I won't. We tell people about what we believe in and Really the only thing we can do is pray that one day they'll understand it and choose for themselves to follow... that's my response...
And btw. I agree about being prochoice. I don't like abortion or the idea behind killing a life, however that's not up to me to decide for anyone. I believe that women should have a choice in the matter. Prochoice isn't just about abortion... its about the right to choose.
I can't think of anything else to talk about lol
very reminiscent of Donald Miller. I loved it Mack, I thought the beginning of it was a newspaper article that you were going to comment on, but then I realized it was just you. After hanging out with you in Denver and reading things you write, I've begun to see a new side of you apart from the little girl that used to fight with Katherine and wear her hair at ear-length. I have no doubt that your trip to New Orleans in January played some part in your growing up, but I just want you to know I'm definitely proud of who you've become, and I like to look up to you as a role-model. You're well-deserving of the title. I love that you're seeing things differently and that you care more now about relationships than a quick fix to a problem. When we were in Denver that night and the guy was asking us for some money for a hot drink my initial reaction was "sorry bud, but I don't have any money". Not ever knowing how to help, since you don't know what kind of people they really are. The thought never even occurred to me to offer him my own drink. For some reason your tiny act of love made me stop and think, and realize, why didn't I think of that. Now next time, I hope I do remember, and then maybe some other girl will be with me and it will make her think and she'll ask me why I acted how I did. Besides the fact that I was following the much too quoted acronym WWJD, I can tell her I pulled a Mack, and your tradition will continue on just like Pay it Forward. Face it, from now on, you're famous. I apologize for all the publicity in advance.
love,
des
well. i really enjoyed this blog. it is hard for me to have an opinion on the topic because i don't know much about it like you do and i don't feel like i'm really in the place to make a statement. but i really like what you have to say and i feel like it is a great issue to want to fix. everyone is going to express their christianity in different ways, even if it is the wrong way. not everyone can be amazing like zack or YOU. people are always going to be handing out bibles either because it is their job or because they want to share their faith. although you have great points it can be perceived many different ways. i think that everyone is searching for a deeper meaning and until they find what they are looking for they fill their time with things like handing out bibles. but i also think that as long as their are faithful christians out there, like you, everything will work out :)
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